At Random

In an effort to improve the image of this publication, this month’s winner selection includes no veiled references to body parts, sexual activities or bodily functions. Instead, it is a thinking man’s (or woman’s) Joke of the Month.

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The winner this month comes from Susan Storms in The Leuthold Group. This was not a hometown decision. The panel of judges had no idea who submitted what jokes. If you find this joke offensive, it should be noted that Susan herself is Catholic.

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Chuck Zender of The Leuthold Group tells about the eight year old visiting his Grandma. He was full of questions.

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This cruel gem came from a woman at Waters Bar in Minneapolis. Her first name was Leann, but I don’t recall her last name. (Nor did I get a phone number.)

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To avoid any potential or real conflicts of interest, a panel of judges is now employed to select the monthly winner.

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This may be getting out of hand. We are experiencing very good joke flow, but not very good jokes.

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The blue ribbon stays in Minnesota this month, with the winner coming from John Nagel of Carlson Investment Group....OK John, now will you become a client?

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We didn’t even have a good runner up this month. This joke, told by Lee Cooperman at the November Collins Associates Conference in Newport Beach, was the uncontested winner.

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The winner comes from Tony Carideo, a financial writer at The Star Tribune in Minneapolis. I think it is sufficiently sick for Wall Street tastes and should also offend at least some constituencies. Therefore, it seems to meet the proper qualifications.

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Gary Greenberg (Greenberg & Associates) had the winner before a late entry by Scott Archer beat him out. The fact that Scott is a new member of The Leuthold Group has nothing to do with this impartial judgement.

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Last month there was considerable negative feedback because the Joke of the Month winner was not a reader of this publication. From now on, winners will be selected only from reader entries.

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The July submissions from clients and friends were either unfit for publication or too “regional” to be appropriate for this publication’s global readership. This month's winner is from Morris K. Udall’s recent book “Too Funny to Be President”. Congressman Mo Udall’s book is great fun (Henry Holt, 1988). Pick up a copy.

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A number of you had China jokes this last month and of course there were the usual number of “totally unfit for publication” jokes. The winner comes from Gibbs Roddy (Loring, Wolcott and Coolidge) in Boston. I believe it is our first winner ever from Boston.

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The blue-ribbon winner is once again Roger Young (Criterion Management in Houston). Roger has come to dominate this monthly competition much as the Celtics once dominated professional basketball and the specialists once dominated the stock market.

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This comes from one of our investment management readers, a chief investment officer who wishes to remain anonymous. (After you read the joke, you will understand why).

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Readers will find additional humor (I hope) in this issue’s “Fearless Forecasts”, but in keeping with tradition, we also need a joke of the month. This month’s winner comes from Chuck Zender, here at The Leuthold Group. It is quite timely.

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Today it is 23 degrees below zero here in The North Country. It seems like an appropriate time to include one of Walt Deemer’s lousy jokes. I suspect it is an original.

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Please, more jokes folks.

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This month there is a tie. While Dick Perkins’ political joke would have been more appropriate a month ago, it is so cute. Even if you happen to be a Democrat, it is still cute. The second winner comes from Walter Deemer (Deemer Technical Research). Walter resides in Florida, but don’t all technicians live in Florida these days?

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This month we have a tie. Both the winners are timely, dealing with a now well-known politician. The first comes from The Leuthold Group's Chuck Zender and the second from Ellsworth Davis in Hartford.

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